Turns out the Internet connection over here is going to be a son of a bitch about posting videos, so it looks like that won’t be happening for the time being. I will keep them stored, naturally, and will shock and awe you with a flurry of poorly shot, rambling videos all at once down the road. Stay tuned for that as you move through your life. How will you manage?

I am back at the hostel. This is it.

And this is what it does to me:

I thought things would be a little bit different here, but all of the same people, minus the creepy guy, are right where I left them. That didn’t stop the employees from forgetting I was here not a week ago. I let them read me the rules again, and then when they figured out I had stayed here before, they asked me why I hadn’t stopped them. I told them that I thought they might enjoy reading the rules, and I didn’t want to deprive them of that.

Not one laugh.

In other news, Internet access isn’t 20 Euros a day anymore. This fact makes me do this:

Let’s backtrack a few days. We left Munich in a hail of traffic, and arrived in Stuttgart after what must’ve been 4 hours. We decided to check out the Porsche Museum. Impressive building. Everything down to the brochures was made of stuff that is nicer than everything I own.

We decided to check out the Stuttgart version of Oktoberfest. It had the lights and the beer and the tents, but it still felt…weak. It felt very Sonoma County Fair-ish at times, except I didn’t have to worry about running in to people I don’t like from high school while up in the grandstands at the horse races, which was a refreshing feeling.

A couple of neighborhood toughs—goths, I’d say—were making a ruckus on the train on the way there. Considering some German towns have posted signs saying that excess noise will net you a fine, I considered Google Translating their Daria act all the way to a Polizei station. I’ve been on trains more than I’ve been asleep. They just make things so goddamn easy. If LA had a subway network, it would truly be unstoppable. I could get down to the Redondo Olive Garden and make it back by the time the Diddy Riese line picks up.

We got out, and came upon a similar sight as the one we were greeted with the night before in Munich, except maybe a 1/4 of the people.

Looking at these rides made my head spin. They looked rickety as hell, and needless to say, we were not necessarily fired up at the prospect of drinking beer and riding some spin-heavy accidents-waiting-to-happen.

We entered one of the tents, found a seat easily, and ordered up some Stuttgart stuff. I am so pro red saurkraut now I just want to dedicate an entire post to it, but I have a feeling that would alienate my readership.

We left a little early, only to be seated next to some drunk Ukrainian on the train. He was from Kiev. I was scared of him because he could snap my neck by looking at it, but he worked at a hotel or some horse’s ass. Tough to be intimidating when your potential victim is picturing you in some bellhop’s outfit carrying his FUCKIN’ suitcases. He made a dig at my Dad’s socks. That’s when I knew we could be in trouble.

We split from Stuttgart after only a night, and we made our way to Nuremberg to check out the Documentation Center and Rally Grounds. Again, and not to bore anybody because there isn’t anything I can say that hasn’t been said before, but those National Socialist fuckers were monsters.

We made our way out of Nuremberg, and 4 hours later, we rumbled into Berlin having put something like 1850 KM on the rental car. I will NOT convert that into miles. DO NOT ASK. Overall, here is a rough outline of the route we took:

Big thanks to my Dad for facilitating the entire trip. I had a really great time, despite being forced to learn how to drive a stick. I suppose some walls were meant to come down. (BERLIN WALL REFERENCE)

That’s a Berlinerweis. Beer with syrup. Do not.

Also, send well wishes to my Mom, who took a nasty spill and broke her elbow. She went in for surgery today, but she is a trooper and is phased by nothing like this.

Other photos:

And just in case you haven’t watched this in awhile:

Goodnight, or depending on the degree of the snoring that happens in this room, worstnightever!