I don’t feel prepared to write about Oktoberfest just yet, so I’m providing a convenient preview to get everyone adequately excited. Below is a before and after series of photographs:

Before:

After:

The string around my neck leads to a photograph inside of a heart. It had mustard on it. I did the Linus Van Pelt dance (shown below) on a fucking picnic table, then I high-fived 200+ people.

Coincidentally, I also took out a megaphone when the crowd broke into “We Are The Champions” and said something to the same effect as Charlie Brown. I am well-liked and respected.