Look. I KNOW I said I’d be trying to update this thing every day, but it’s a process, alright? To compensate you for your tireless devotion, here is a photo of me after looking at a German washing machine for 25 minutes.

Tonight, I’m going to a bar where some friends are playing music. I might just play, also. If a video of this turns up on the Internet, as well as the subsequent response video of me being thrown into the river nearby for poorly covering Katy Perry’s “Teenage Dream” for kicks, I’m just going to cry.